Sugar Words

Perfection – A construct made by society. I often pondered what exactly being perfect means? Does it mean being devoid of flaws? But then it’s only when we make mistakes, we learn and become better, right?

Then is perfection to fail forward? If we are always looking towards failure (even if it’s taking us ahead), aren’t we saying that we are not technically succeeding at anything, so are we even achieving perfection?

Every quote, every video gives different versions of perfection. The one that sticks with me is- you decide what you make of it. But at that very moment, the rational human (as defined by the assumptions in economics) in me awakens. According to that personality (rational human), we are always looking for higher satisfaction. I know that toiling does not make one feel content; the expectation of result does. This suggests that the opportunity cost of giving up short-term satisfaction should be lower than the satisfaction received after burning the midnight oil. So, it definitely cannot be a failure. Is it success then? But in that case what is success? 

Success does not mean the same thing for everyone. The definition of success does not stay static even for the same person in two consecutive months. Thus, both perfection and success are subjective. The question arises- are perfection and success the same thing? If they were the same thing – then once we reach success, we would settle and never aim to stride forward as we think of perfection to be the highest or last level. We know that the rational personality in us is greedy. That is, it would not stop at a million dollars, or 3000 followers, or one masterpiece. The mere possibility that more money, fame, and satisfaction can be achieved keeps us unsatisfied. Therefore, success has nothing to do with perfection. A day could be perfect owing to elation felt but not particularly successful.

We know that fame, money, etc. do not always follow the law of diminishing marginal utility, i.e., more you have more you want (I know it depends on person’s nature, etc., but in the general scheme of things – this is true – as I told you – we are intrinsically greedy). Perfection or success is addictive like a drug. If they resemble the properties of a drug, then that would mean we would never be fully satisfied. So, then perfection and success have nothing to do with satisfaction. Maybe that’s why so many successful people are not content or at peace. 

Hence perfection does not bring us satisfaction or success. It does not have some absolute definition. Everyone knows what is perfection but no one can define it. Then why all of us are after this abstract concept? 

Like so many social constructs, perfection has been misused, incorrectly juxtaposed, and misinterpreted. 

Perfection has taken the path of percolating fear of not getting it right. We use the word perfect to describe something done correctly. So, if you are not perfect, even if you are successful and satisfied you did not quite reach the destination of “doing it correctly without hiccups or spots.”

Most people find it challenging to work with perfectionists, as they are never satisfied with anyone’s work including theirs. There is no limit to doing it just right. Plus, no one in complete essence knows what is- just right.

It makes people feel judged and doubt themselves. It also scares people to experiment with something new because they are afraid of not getting it right. Moreover, it makes a person who is a “perfectionist” less of a team player as he/she cannot trust anyone else to do anything. In turn, burdening one person and leading to burnout. 

The concept of perfection has taken a path that is not beneficial for the one striving for perfection or people working with a perfectionist, then why are we still holding onto it? 

A 100/100 would be a perfect score, but if it does not add to your learning, then what is the use?

Maybe it’s time to let go of the concept of perfection. And look at what gives you satisfaction.

To strive to achieve not “just right” but to achieve something you never thought you could, to take risks and make mistakes. Most importantly to learn through the process – both good and bad parts. Discovering new right and wrong. And taking the reigns from a construct confining us, in our hand.