Sugar Words

“Always keep learning. It keeps you young.” ~ Patty Berg

As a kid, I always loved to learn a new skill or an art form. But gradually, I realized that curiosity started transforming into – “what if I am pathetic at it,” “what if I end up wasting time,” or “will it even add to my personality development?” etc.

On the other hand, I also desperately wanted to try new things. So, one day I went all in and decided to learn a new sport – football. To give you some context, the last time I played a sport properly was in 8th grade, and I have never played a team sport before.

Fortunately, many players were also beginners, so I did not entirely feel out of place, but I still felt I did not quite fit in. And the reason was simple – I was continuously trying to excel at something instead of learning like a beginner. Fear of not being good at something was lurking in the corner at all times.

The team soon started playing for tournaments – which my mind translated into – performance analysis time. Hence, I put in extra hours just so that I do not suck at it. That is where I faltered – I feared to be terrible at football. But the thing I was truly terrible at was – being a beginner!

The magic formula is –

1) Suck at it

2) Learn from your mistakes (from when you perform terribly)

3) Enjoy being a beginner

4) Enjoy the art/sport/activity

When I think about it in retrospection-

Many teammates were bad at the sport but good at being a beginner. So, they did not let the criticism, unsolicited advisors, or bad performances affect their learning or enjoyment.

The thing is – as we turn into adults – we think we always need to be at least “decent” at something. Otherwise, we would be judged, or are doing something wrong, or wasting our time.

Which if you see, are all very well-thought doubts, and they stand true on many grounds in our society. So, our sensible selves are trying to protect us from failure – which is inevitable when learning something new. But protecting oneself is not growing. Growing is exploring new territories of your personality, challenging yourself, being courageous enough to suck at something, and being curious and learning like a kid all over again.

There is a simple cost-benefit analysis –

If you do not even try to learn something new – you will miss out on opportunities to grow as a person, meet new people (future friends), and possibly a future in that sport/art.

But if you do try, the worst that can happen is you can be terrible at it in the beginning. But what if you turn out to be extraordinary at it, you discover new strengths and meet amazing people?

You will gain more by choosing the latter.

So, take that leap.

Learning football made me realize I genuinely enjoy running and that I should never challenge someone on feet strength (it’s a story for another day).

But two of the most important things I learned was –

1) how to not let setbacks affect the game (or life for that matter)

2) to be gentle towards beginners and never repeatedly point at their failures (they already know what they did)

Learning might fail to keep you young, but being a beginner will make sure you stay humble.

You ask how? Well, failing makes you realize that there will always be something you do not know – not just about the world but also about yourself. And there is only one way to make sure that you fail at things but not so drastically that it affects your life financially or physically – by trying new things.

Being a beginner time and again also subconsciously erases the concept of “age”, “right field for you,” “choose one box,” and keeps shaping you in ways that you cannot even imagine! But most importantly it makes your heart gentler and your mind braver.