Sugar Words

Going through life, meeting multiple people, loving them and losing them. This is the cycle all of us go through no matter what. Mass media and personal experiences have pushed us to be extra careful about where we put our love, whom we invest our time in etc, but the minute you let that overpower you, the love becomes full of conditions and leaves everyone involved starving for more. 

The most powerful love is the one that you give without an expectation of reciprocation. When you make yourself a river, you do not think about the rain, only the water that flows through you. 

Will this bring hurt? There is no way you can escape that, in fact when you try to escape hurt which again is derived from love, you are rowing away farther from love. 

Jacques Lusseyran puts this beautifully  – “Darkness, for me, was still light, but in a new form and a new rhythm. It was light at a slower pace. In other words, nothing in the world, not even what I saw inside myself with closed eyelids, was outside this great miracle of light.” 

The minute you realise that loss is just space, it changes the way you see people, see love, see opportunities. All in all, even the hurt changes you for the better. However, it is essential to know where it starts eating up on your self-love. The catch of learning the art of loving without reciprocation is that it first requires you to learn the art of knowing that giving love is not just about other people or your ambitions but it is also about loving yourself without conditions. 

When you stand in a place where you love yourself without attaching it to any outcome be it about whether you got that job, whether you finished your to-do list, or someone was able to align with what you expected them to be, you release yourself from the burden that any of these will change how you love yourself. When it comes to loving ourselves, we are looking for reciprocation from external elements. And when they don’t go as per what we thought,  we start to reprimand ourselves, which is when we fall short of loving ourselves without conditions.

The beauty of learning how to love yourself without reciprocation is to recognise your strength, the quiet power of your heart, to truly know who you are and keep finding ways to become a better human above all. When you are compassionate to yourself, you automatically reflect on the outside world. What changes is that you see the beauty of this world, you focus on the love that is and was there, and everything that  keeps saying “Life is so beautiful, and you get to taste all of it” 

The immediate effect is that once you embody this thinking, you also can embark on the journey of loving external elements be it people or situations without reciprocation. Simply because you are not worried about the outcome, as the outcome is separate from you, the love you give and what you gain from it. When reciprocation is removed, you are not seeking it and it flows to you. 

When the expectation of reciprocation is removed, it makes you more present in what you are holding right now and helps you appreciate this life, yourself, people around you in all its glory. Another transformation that takes place is that you do not let the memories turn sour, because you can take what happened and what is happening as is, without feeling the need to attach any specific emotion to it. This makes you more peaceful, happier and without regrets. 

Do not let expectations of reciprocation let you hold onto ways you were wronged in turn closing your potential. Allow yourself to release, so that you can take this life gently in your hands, and be amazed by it, amazed by the human experience of feeling everything. 

Give, Give, Give

Love, Love, Love

Till you forget where giving ends and receiving begins 

Because it all starts and ends with you.

It all will be a blur in the end, might as well be a colourful one.